It’s absolutely ridiculously silly, one knows. Still, one cannot help but shiver and have goosebumps whenever one hears you-know-who’s name.
It’s irrational, one also admits. One’s alter ego constantly scolds one for being scared senseless whenever you-know-who being talked of.
Yet it happened again, a gut reaction to a name being said out loud that, first, rendered one paralyzed and shocked, and then made one go bonkers. All along, the alter-ego pounded one’s head, trying to instill common sense and reason.
autre moi, “Stop it! It’s all in your mind…”
moi, “I know! But I can already envision you-know-who coming in somewhere, crawling…. No, there! at that end of this tunnel!”
autre moi, “Don’t go there! Shut your thoughts! Think of something else!”
moi, “but… She’s getting near… No! She’s coming… Look!”
autre moi, with a sigh of resignation, “Okay… Calm down! Breathe and calm down… Let’s do what we’ve been practicing for these moments…”
As one braced oneself for the inevitability of an imagined encounter with you-know-who, one’s hand made a fist that was so strong, one’s nails bit the palm that surely would leave marks for days.
moi, panic intensified, chanting uncontrollably, “…. She’s coming… She’s coming…”
autre moi, smacked one’s head and shushed. “Shut up!”
……… and you-know-who was coming closer and closer until we were within an arm’s length from each other. She stopped.
moi, ‘…. Right…. What we’ve been practicing for moments like this…’
One stepped aside to make way for her.
moi, “… Douzo….”
and so… she continued walking, and thank God, without looking back.
…. all the while, another alter-ego, who sat back and watched the whole thing, was shaking one’s head while taking in this internal travesty….
What started all of these, one wonders over and over again. As one recalls, when one sat through the film, one didn’t think one would develop such reaction to the mere mention of you-know-who. But one had been affected so badly apparently. One still hopes, though, that these ridiculousness would one day go away.
What a funny yet incredible thing, our mind is…